Couples Intensives

Most couples therapies are behavioral in nature. They speak to what not to do. Research shows, however, that that only works for a short period of time, and those couples return to the disconnecting behaviors that brought them to therapy in the first place.

EFT is unique in 3 ways.

• Experiential: Rather than give you a set of skills to work on, we want you to experience connection with your partner in the counseling room. It’s hard to slow down your cycle of conflict alone, so that’s what we’ll focus on at first. We need to slow down your conversations in the therapy room and help you unpack what is actually happening.

• Emotion-Focused: We don’t just talk about our emotions in session. We look at the emotional experiences you're having, the bodily sensations that accompany those emotions, and the story you’re telling yourself and help you actually feel what you’re feeling and connect to it. The deeper we can get you into that emotional experience in the session, the better you’ll have a memory of this feeling and be able to interrupt it when you’re outside the counseling room.

• Attachment-Based: Your partner is supposed to be your safe person in the world, the one you run to when the storms of life happen. But that doesn’t feel true right now and we can do some pretty crazy stuff to our partner when we don’t think they’ll be there to catch us. We’ll try to reframe those maddening behaviors through this lens because if we do, your partner might start looking more like a lover in distress than an enemy.

There are many advantages to doing an intensive.

• Time: Unlike weekly therapy, we aren’t governed by the clock during an intensive. If we need to extend a session for some reason, we can.

  Also, there’s very little time wasted in an intensive. In weekly therapy, we usually spend the first 5-10 minutes of a session checking in or recapping what happened in the last session. In an intensive, we can pick up right where we left off. There’s momentum in an intensive that weekly therapy cannot match.

• Depth: With this momentum comes a depth that takes months and months of trust-building within weekly therapy to obtain. In an intensive, we take advantage of the emotional safety we build together over the 2 or 3 days we’re together and this allows you and your partner to go deeper faster.

• Scheduling: For some couples, it’s hard to fit weekly therapy in their busy or unpredictable schedules. Doing a 2 or 3-day intensive takes this pressure off a couple because it’s a one-time commitment.

Intensives are not for every couple. As you consider an intensive - keep these things in mind:

• Addiction: Couples in which one or both partners have an active addiction are not candidates for the intensive. If there is an ongoing affair - the intensive (or any couples therapy) is not an option.

• Mixed Agenda: If you and your partner do not have the same goal for therapy, this isn't a good format for you. In other words, if one partner wants to work on the marriage and the other doesn't - an intensive isn't the place to figure that out.

• Unsafe: If being in the same room for a long time is too triggering (potential trauma reaction) or you haven't been able to be in the same space without being civil in a period of time - this format will not be productive.

• Violence: If there is active intimate partner violence, this (or any couples therapy) is not an option.

If after reading these bullet points, you're unsure if you're a good fit for the intensive, please email me (victor@mallincounseling.com).

I’m happy to help assess if this is a good time for you to engage in this format of counseling. If it's not, I’m also happy to help you find resources for other help.

As with any psychotherapy, results are not guaranteed.

Day One

• 9 am - 10 am: joint session

• 10 am - 11 am: individual session

• 11 am - 12 pm: individual session

• 12 pm - 2 pm: break

• 2 pm - 4 pm: joint session

Day Two

• 9 am - 11 am: joint session

• 11 am - 1 pm: break

• 1 pm - 3 pm: joint session

Once we have chosen a date for your intensive, we will send you onboarding documents to complete.

We will hold the dates of your intensive for one week. By the end of the week, we need to have your completed onboarding documents returned in our Client Portal.

Part of your onboarding documents will be entering in a credit or debit card number to your portal account. Your card will be run for the non-refundable deposit (half of the total intensive cost) as soon as we have your credit card information. You will not be charged any additional service fees for running the credit card.

The balance will be due two weeks after your deposit is paid.

If you have not completed paperwork by one week after booking the intensive, your dates will be released and available to other potential clients.

If you need to reschedule your intensive, you can do so up to 2 weeks before.

If you choose to reschedule, the non-refundable deposit will be used toward your rescheduled date.

If you cancel after the 2-week window, you'll be charged the entire amount of the intensive cost.

We will work with you on a follow up plan for after the intensive.

If you’re coming from out of town, you’ll be paired with an EFT therapist local to you (or online if there aren’t good local options) before the intensive starts.

In addition, couples who sign a release will benefit from coordination between myself and your follow up therapist so aftercare can be seamless and efficient.

Ideally, the next therapist will be phoned in on the last day of the intensive so the transition can be as smooth as possible.

We will be in touch with you about your specific follow up plan before your intensive date. Like the entire process, this will be a collaborative effort. Your input on the follow up work is important.